Little Lies That Moms Tell

We’ll actually say that most parents in general probably tell these lies about how they raise their kids. It’s not that we really have to lie about these habits to cover up the truth (because everyone does them), it’s just that we don’t want others to judge us, right? We want to look like parent of the year, when really we get busy and sometimes have to cave.

Lie #1) “I don’t feed my kid junk food.” One parent tried making her daughter a fresh packed lunch every day, but it got hard to keep it up, plus her daughter was bringing home unfinished portions, or wouldn’t even touch the packed lunch at all. School lunch it is.

Lie #2) “I make my kids do a lot of ‘enrichment exercises.'” This of those as “brain games,” or anything that would help the child think and learn. A parent said she always agrees with her parent friends about the importance of sending kids to enrichment programs or working with them at home, but admits she hasn’t tried yet.

Lie #3) Infinite patience. We always say we’re super patient with our children, but if you spent an afternoon in our homes you’d see otherwise, probably pretty quickly. I guess we’re trying to appear to have a calm, collected, and patient personality so other people think we’re completely put together, but honestly – nobody would judge us for getting frustrated with the hard plastic toy slamming into the baseboard over and over. Don’t even get us started on the “why” game.

4) Telling people we never stress about ______. This was described as a lie to yourself rather than to others (even though you say it out loud TO others) to try and convince yourself that you can handle it. It’ll work one day. Right?

5) “I always buy my kids educational toys.” Well, sometimes the stuffed toy from the latest animated movie just hits the spot, you know?

6) “I’ve never spanked my children.” Enough said.

7) “I would never leave my kids alone in the car.” This one seems like a cardinal sin because of all the attention a few stories have gotten in the media over the last couple years, and since we’re heading into summer. I think that’s why parents lie about it, because someone will overhear they left the kids in the car for a minute or two and then the police will show up.

8) “I allow minimal television.” You say it, and you honestly try to limit their TV time, but sometimes it just works, you know?

9) “I give my children undivided attention.” We try to show that we can get everything done and still keep track of everything our kids are doing, except that time they dumped chocolate syrup all over the white carpet, or colored on the walls, or knocked the fish tank over, or….

10) I always follow through with consequences.” Well, sometimes threat is enough, but sometimes your threatened consequence isn’t something you wanted to do in the first place, so you just, you know, fail at enforcing the promise. Oh well.

11) I never have uncontrollable road-rage with my kids in the car.” I mean, have you even driven around here recently? It happens, despite what everyone tells everyone else.

12) “I have it all together.” Nope, I didn’t put my pants on backwards while trying to feed the kids this morning, and I totally intended to wear one black and one red shoe today. Yep.


More from Mark S. Allen In The Morning

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